On Posing Nude, Part 1

A few weeks ago, I got an email from a photographer I had never met, Geoffrey W. Greer, inviting me to participate in his nude photo series, Shoot 150. When you are a 5’3” just-under-plus-sized woman, this is not the sort of invitation you expect to receive. At least I didn’t. My first thought was that it had to be a scam. Because why, out of all the beautiful women in DC, would this guy ask me to pose for him?

Geoffrey described his project as “all about beauty, sexuality and women in their real homes and real environments...an attempt to remove artifice and shoot something a bit more reflective of reality.” He wrote that he had done 131 shoots since March 2008 and said, “Each shoot has been fun, unique and most importantly produced work that everyone involved has been very proud of.”

Despite my skepticism, I liked the description of the project. It seemed like something I could get behind—exploring the beauty of real women in their real environments. I went to the website and fell in love with the photos and the diverse visual stories they capture.

Then the body image issues kicked in. Did I really believe I deserved a place in Geoffrey’s Pantheon of 150 Goddesses?

I wrestled with this question for a long time. My body image right now is better than it has been at any other point in my life, thanks to a lot of hard emotional work over the last several years, but is it really good enough that I could be comfortable posing nude?

Here’s why I decided to do it: I thought it would be an interesting body image challenge. What would I learn about myself from the process? And even more important, how might my body image change given the chance to see myself through the lens of an artist rather than through the same tired lens of my own doubts and insecurities? I couldn’t pass up the opportunity.

So I checked references and took safety precautions, and this morning I opened the door of my apartment to a man I’d never met, and I took off my clothes.